Growing or free falling



Growing or free falling

Moses was a man who asked to be blotted out from God’s book if God didn’t forgive his brother’s and sister’s sins. He lived for his people and was prepared to die for his people.

And at the end of the leader’s journey, Moses desired greatly to enter the land. And he prayed for it hundreds of times.

It doesn’t happen.

That doesn’t make sense because Moses is a hero of the Torah, if not The Hero. What kind of message is that from God to us?

Kabbalistically, desire that is manifest loses its powers.

Moses’s hidden deep gift to us is the blessings we haven’t yet received – the desire for the blessings we haven’t yet received.

The gift that Moses received for all of his prayers was the gift of pain from lack, and the gift of desire.

Moses’s gift to us, which we can connect to this Shabbat, is unfulfilled desire.

The greatest desire is unfulfilled desire as it assures that we will never be disconnected from the light of the Source.

How much pain am I experiencing right now about my lack of spiritual connection, wisdom and growth?

My connection is proportionate to the pain I feel from the lack of that connection.

I am growing or free falling.

So Moses’s constant prayers and desires manifested into the greatest possible gift to him and to us.

The gift of experiencing purpose in desire.

Understanding the deeper need for lack.

It is taught that every prayer cast and desire summoned is heard from the Source and accumulates and creates more light around us. The wise will not judge life’s circumstances and physical outcomes until they explore the hidden and more significant blessings contained.



Growing or free falling

The Mind Body Connection



The Mind Body Connection

It’s amazing how much our mind can cause us to identify with self imposed limitations. There’s a lot that’s been written about the mind body connection – how our thoughts create our reality. “The Power of Now” emphasizes the importance of tapping into and experiencing the Now by reining the mind in from concern over the past and anxiety about the future. There’s “The Secret”, which focuses on how our thoughts create our reality – if we visualize abundance in our lives we can actualize it through the power of attraction; and if we house negative energy, we broadcast negative frequencies attracting more of the same.

There’s revolutionary wisdom in all of this. But there’s nothing quite as powerful as putting this wisdom to the test and actually seeing it at work in your life.

Dr. John Sarno shares some deep wisdom about the epidemic of back pain, and other modern day ailments extending to neck pain, allergies, skin rashes and other forms of disease.

The idea is that we all house painful emotions in our subconscious mind. And the brain, acting in self defense, distracts the mind from bringing those painful emotions into consciousness by creating diversions through the experience of pain in our physical body. And, that the pain we experience is caused by a lack of blood flow and oxygen, rather than a structural abnormality.

As the command center of the body, the brain regulates the flow of blood and oxygen throughout. As an example, when a person encounters a lion in the jungle, in self defense, the brain increases the heartbeat and directs the flow of blood to the muscles and legs to prepare the body to run or fight. The “thought” of fear generated by the sight of the lion, affects our “reality” – the blood flow in our body.

The most vulnerable target for this operation to play itself out is in an area of our body which we believe houses a “structural abnormality” – like a bulging disk. In reality, most adults over 40 will show some type of disk “abnormality”. It’s a sign of aging, like gray hair and wrinkles – but most are not experiencing pain. So why do so many of us experience this as ongoing and progressive pain? We are taught and believe that we are limited by an “abnormality”. Society reinforces it. It becomes a very convenient place to hide behind. So many others do. It’s socially acceptable. And that’s just where it starts.

We then start to identify with forms of relief from our limitation, and become further limited by empowering them over us. “Whenever I drive, my spine is compressed and I’m in pain for a week” – so, whenever I drive I experience pain for a week. “Whenever I put my socks on, I experience tightness in my lower back”, so as soon as I grab my socks and sit down to put them on, guess what? “I only feel a sense of relief after I get acupuncture”… “ Surgery is the only way to get out of this pain”, etc…

But we are playing a game of whack a mole. We may find temporary relief in treatment, but until we deal with what’s going on in our subconscious, the mind will continue to create diversions – enforcing our limitations. And we will continue to identify with, and be enslaved by these diversions – wherever in our body they may show up next. The brain can be a powerful tool in the hands of the adversary.

The sensation of pain I experience is real! But in reality, the sensation I’m experiencing as pain, is really the sensation of the reverberation of painful emotions manifesting themselves as tension in familiar target areas of my body – resulting in a lack of blood and oxygen flow to my lower back. I’m “holding onto” and housing subconscious stress in my body. But when I confront my brain, and identify my painful subconscious emotions and sources of tension, I blow its covert operation. I bring my emotions to mind, no longer hiding behind tension in my back. My thoughts create a new reality. The acquisition of this wisdom redefines my physical reality.

I injured my back moving a granite table on New Years Eve. Up until yesterday I was in constant pain – and it was escalating daily. I decided to have a soul to mind conversation with myself. I identified the causes of tension in my life. I recognized the “pain” as reverberations of this tension. I then had a pep talk with my brain and blew its covert operation. I decided that I am just fine. That the pain I was experiencing was caused by the tension I’m housing in my lower back – and that while I did injure my back from lifting a table, I wasn’t gonna let that become my new identity.

I immediately started to experience results – and from that point there’s no turning back. Life has changed. It’s like once you acquire wisdom, you’ve reached a point of no return.

This is a major lesson in life – in our spiritual journey. “I’m not a leader”, “I’m not a good writer”, “I don’t have time to exercise”, “I always lose my temper with my kids”, “I don’t feel a connection to Source through my prayers” — all create limitations and all become real. They are all manifestations of self imposed limitations stemming from subconscious fears and false ideas – many times originating from childhood. And, we can change them.

The brain is a tool we need to use, not who we are. It’s the command center and we are the general.



The Mind Body Connection





Rebbe Nachman teaches in L’M I:64 that the Source created the world to reveal its mercy, because if it hadn’t created the world, the Source would have no one to whom it could reveal its mercy.

This would mean that the Source created us in order to have mercy on us and to show us its mercy. And, that everything that happens in our lives is a result of the Source’s mercy on us. And, since everything the Source does is mercy for us, we should thank the Source for everything that happens in our lives.

Really? Mercy is what our forefathers went through from test to harder test, from being thrown in a pit to die, sold as slaves, to having to accept sacrificing a son? Mercy is what we are experiencing in our lives through all of our suffering and challenges? It doesn’t always feel that way.

What exactly is mercy?

In Leviticus 19:17-18 we are instructed: “you shall love your neighbor as yourself”

On a personal level, this can teach us that the more you want the Source to have mercy on you the more you should have mercy on others.

There are two primary forms of giving love. Chesed “Kindness” and Rachamim “Mercy”

Kindness is “I give”  – Mercy is “I give through connecting with their souls”

There are different forms of mercy.

Mercy is a blend of chesed “kindness” and gevurah “judgement/limitation” Sometimes its merciful to a child to not give them what they want – and sometimes it’s merciful to enforce consequences to a child’s actions that are not in line with the child’s definition of kindness. Through limitation and judgement, higher kindness can be expressed.

In order for us to have the opportunity to grow, we must meet resistance at every new level. The same applies to body building – to grow muscles we must increase resistance and rip fiber. To increase endurance we must run farther.


On the journey toward spiritual growth, we refer to resistance as our adversary, who’s purpose is to protect the treasure of higher connection, understanding and joy.

Once destroyed, the adversary comes back stronger because we are stronger and need greater resistance to grow further.

And this is why the tests get harder and harder. And since the Source is eternal and never ending, so too is our journey of evolution, as part of the Source.

We need the opportunity to grow and illuminate – that’s our purpose. And the Source provides us with this opportunity through mercy.